Blog by Sarah Goodwin

Following the crowd

‘Emo/Skater/Scene/Chav/Indie/Trendy’ are just a few of the labels that young people today choose to attach themselves to…but why do they do this? One major reason is peer pressure. Young people are under immense pressure from those around them to conform to what society deems as ‘normal’. As long as you follow what everybody else is doing-you will be accepted in to that group, and you will find community. But isn’t there another way of finding acceptance?

Sense of belonging

I believe that something young people are desperate for is a sense of belonging. Being part of a community. So, what does community bring them? Well, a community is a place where different people come together with a common identity, where everybody belongs and has a part to play.

We can see this expressed in Churches; people from all parts of the world come together in one building to meet for a common reason, a shared purpose regardless of where they come from. Everyone in that community is accepted, has something to bring and has a reason for being there, which fulfils the desire to belong.

Purpose in life

Adolescence is an extremely difficult time. Young people are beginning to face the huge questions of ‘Who am I?’ ‘What part do I have to play?’ ‘What is life all about?’. These questions come alongside coping with all the changes they are going through physically and emotionally. In school, they are deciding which subjects will help them find the careers they want, picking the right GCSE’s will lead to picking the right A-Levels which leads to choosing the right degree which will open the door to the perfect career. We’re talking about life-changing decisions here-making the choices at 14 years old that affect them in 10 years to come. In a life that moves constantly at 100mph, its not surprising that young people struggle to find their purpose.

Loneliness

So what happens if you aren’t part of group like a Church, a youth group or a sports club; where do you belong? Who shares the same interests as you? Who cares about you? Young people can turn to all sorts as a means of ‘fitting in’ with the crowd. Some researchers suggest that could be one of the reasons young people turn to drugs. They are a part of something, they aren’t alone any more, they are part of a shared experience. Family breakdowns also have a lasting effect in the lives of young people too. In fact, I think this could be where all these things stem from. If young people don’t even feel like they are part of their own family unit, then that’s not exactly a great start! This can lead to all sorts of feelings, if a parent leads home then it can lead to shock, rejection, grief, depression, anger and more. If they can’t work out how to live and be part of their own family community, then how does this set them up to enter other communities? How will they know what their role is?

Being bold

Standing out from the crowd is a scary thought for some young people. It’s much easier to just ‘blend in’ and not be seen. Or they follow trends so they’re not ‘outcast’. It helps them to fit under a certain label or category rather than being an individual. It takes courage to stand out and be bold. I think that being secure in yourself also helps, because that takes away some of the fear of being different. Thanks to the media, a lot of young people are shown a very narrow view of what beauty is, and how it is represented. They are told, if you look like this- then you are beautiful, if you don’t then no-one is interested. It is these shallow attitudes that have a massive impact on young people’s self esteem, and it’s yet another HUGE pressure put upon them.

So, where do I believe young people can find all these things?

 Purpose

 Belonging

 Community

 Courage (to be themselves)

 Acceptance

 Truth about image

My answer is God. As a young person, I asked many of these questions. I was lonely, I didn’t know who I was, I didn’t belong anywhere, I didn’t have a purpose and those were dark times in my life. But when someone invited me along to Church-my life completely turned around in every way imaginable. Somebody was a light in the darkness. And now, I am a part of an ever-growing family. I know that I have a part to play in this world, a reason for living, a destiny that I was created to fulfil. But this isn’t just for me! This is an invitation that extends to EVERYBODY who chooses to accept it.

"This is how much God loved the world: He gave his Son, his one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life. God didn't go to all the trouble of sending his Son merely to point an accusing finger, telling the world how bad it was. He came to help, to put the world right again. Anyone who trusts in him is acquitted; anyone who refuses to trust him has long since been under the death sentence without knowing it. And why? Because of that person's failure to believe in the one-of-a-kind Son of God when introduced to him.

John 3:16-18

Written by Sarah Goodwin on placement with D’Biz